Dear Nectarine

Dear Nectarine,

First, every time I call you that, I then want a nectarine.  This will be the hardest post I've had to write so far, but I'll start with the happy things.  Ever since I've been on a prescription, I've felt much, much better.  We only had one day of yucky (well, and last night).  We get to spend this whole weekend with family.  Grandma and Grandpa Otter are coming into town.  We get to bake cookies with YOUR grandma tomorrow.  We will spend Thanksgiving and Grandma and Grandpa Clark's house.  Then Sunday we get to spend more time with your grandparents :)  It should be a great weekend!

This is my bump in the morning before I've eaten, you're much more impressive in the evenings 

And now for the yucky...

I have the pleasure of having the entire week off this week.  Yesterday I spent the day doing laundry, relaxing and not having much stress in my life.  A little over a year ago, we added 2 new members to our family.  Jazmin and Appa.  We got them when they were only 6 weeks old.  

In the first few weeks, Jazmin was clearly the leader of the two.  She kept Appa in line at all times. Whatever she did, was what was going to happen.  It didn't take them very long to learn how to dig.  They  would get out of the yard ALL the time.  Aunt Rachel was living with us at the time and spent many mornings/afternoons chasing them around in the pasture behind the house.  As they got bigger, so did their holes.  

Daddy finally put up a hot wire fence in the backyard.  They stayed in the yard ALL summer.  Jazmin did get hit pretty hard with it once and was gun shy for a couple weeks.  I felt so bad when she wouldn't come out of her doghouse.  Poor baby was electrocuted (I made up for it by electrocuting myself twice that same week).  She got over it and was her same old self.  

Right before school started, they started getting out of the yard again.  They had to be put back into their small dog run while we were gone.  And with school in session, was all the time.  We tried to get them some freedom, but they just kept getting out.  We had gone about a month with no incidents, but last week they got out.  Then again.  Then...Wednesday night, I got a phone call from the American Kennel Society saying the shelter had our dogs.  I went and picked them up, was very disappointed in them.  Jazmin was rechipped because her chip wasn't working.  

Last night Anthony came into the Lund's house while I was making dinner.  We had to leave to go find Appa.  Animal had already been called about Jazmin.  She was hit, and didn't make it.  We covered the holes, we tried to give them freedom, but they kept wanting out.  

Appa was picked up by a neighbor.  He spent his first night inside with us.  I don't know how to tell him she's not coming home.  He looks for her...but refused to go outside.  I don't blame him.  I'm sure was watched it happen.  The numbness from yesterday is gone.  Today I'm sad.  Sad to see only one puppy...sad to see a sad puppy.  Sad that our yard wasn't enough for her.  Sad that she was only a year old.  I have one very loyal and snuggly puppy today...we'll see how long that lasts. I don't know what to do with him. We had them outside so when you came into this world we wouldn't have to change their life style.  We just changed it big time.  Appa lost his sister and his best friend.  I lost my sweet baby girl, who was ornery, stubborn, bossy and a lover.  I will miss her so much.  I will always feel so horrible her life was cut short.  I miss my baby girl.  I miss her wagging tail.  I miss that I know she's allergic to bees and I will never have to worry about that again.  Good bye Jazmin...

Appa's first night/morning with us

Baby Peach

Well...if I don't write this soon you won't be a peach/tangerine anymore. Last Wednesday I was very freaked out by the up all night throwing up we went through. I was incredibly worried something was wrong. As much as I hated it, I was glad when I finally spiked a fever. At least then I knew it was just the flu. The doctor finally prescribed an anti-nausea medication and I haven't been sick since then. We also had a fun adventure clothes shopping. Maternity clothes are quite expensive (or horribly ugly). Daddy and I are going out again tonight to find more fun things. You have a crib sitting in our garage :) I'm so excited to get your room cleaned out and start putting things together. I love you baby. You're growing so fast!

Hello Baby Plum

There we are at 12 weeks.  

Dear Plum,

We went to the doctor this week.  Your heart rate was 160 bpm.  It's the most soothing and happy feeling in the world to hear you; to know you are healthy and still growing inside me.  Which, obviously you are...my belly gets bigger and bigger every day.  I can't believe how much you love tortilla chips.  It's my new addiction.  Thankfully, you like healthy things too.  I told my class this week about you.  They decided you could be named Lightning, Hot Wheels, or...the all time favorite, Fast Girl.  I decided to leave the naming to your dad and I.  I think we'll be able to handle it.  They also wanted to know how I knew I was pregnant.  I told them I went to the doctor and I got to see a picture of you.  Then, they asked when I was getting you...well, I wish it was that easy....to get you.  

I was looking online for baby shower gifts today, and then got a little side tracked.  I found a crib for you that I'm in love with. I think I'm starting to get excited about shopping.  I've been a little timid about buying anything, but I don't think I'm afraid anymore.  I'll always be worried that something might happen to you, but I need to put that fear aside, and start to get myself, this house, and everything else ready, for you.  You're going to be such a happy and spoiled baby :) Just wait, you'll see.

I love you with all my heart and everything I have,

Mom

Baby Lime

Here we are - 11 1/2 weeks and counting. I was starting to feel so much better until the last few days. Now, I can barely keep my dinner down most nights. Baby Lime, we start agreeing! We go into the doctor this week and if things aren't looking better (meaning my stomach) the doctor will for sure know about it. Especially since I'm losing weight, not gaining any.

I am exited we got to go hunting this Fall. Daddy got a deer! Yay! Normally the dead animal wouldn't bother me, but for some reason, I'm more queezy than normal. Silly baby.

Well, I'm keeping this short, busy night. I get to hear your beautiful heartbeat in 3 days :) I love you so very much. (I also love hot chocolate)

Love, Momma

Baby Cherry

Good morning Cherry,

You can suck your thumb this week. I think that's pretty amazing. Daddy is telling me I should talk to you about that and ask you to stop now, then maybe you won't be a thumb sucker. I told him no :) I think it's quite adorable you can suck your thumb.

I'm feeling slightly better this week. But I'm still getting sick every morning after I shower. But at least most days I can stand up to teach. That's always very helpful. I'm telling my class on Halloween that you are coming into this world. I thought it would be better to wait until just before conferences to tell the rest of the world. My belly is getting very, very bloated. I know I'm the only one who notices, but by the end of the day, all I want is a pair of sweats. You make my tummy make very funny noises. Silly baby.

You have all your fingers and toes. AND fun for you...(because you care) you either have testicles or ovaries. Fun right?!?! Well, I'm kind of excited about it.

Well, I'm feeling pretty good today, so Momma needs to go get some stuff done around the house, it's been very neglected since you decided to make me very, very sleepy, and sick most days. But, happily, we're starting to feel better.

I love you!

Love, Mommy

Dear Raspberry

Hello My Darling Raspberry,

We went to the doctor last week to find out that you are bigger than we thought. I will be blessed to see you one week earlier than I thought (and please, don't come any earlier than that).

If you don't want to know what my body is going through, please stop reading now, I'm not going to edit this for graphic material...just FYI.

You still make me sick every morning, but I'm just getting used to it. It's the afternoons I'd like to feel good. I have bad days and good days. Yesterday was a good day, this morning and this afternoon, were bad. I really wish I could keep things down.

I got a call from the doctor telling me that I have a bacterial infection. Uh oh, that can't be good for either of us. This can lead to a bladder infection so they put us on penicillin. I don't think the penicillin is liking either of us much.

But, I did get some very very good news. My CF results came back, and they were negative. That means we never ever have to worry about passing Cystic Fibrosis to you. And that makes me very very happy. It was a huge sigh of relief for your dad and I.

I'm hoping to start feeling better soon, I'm hoping you and I can start agreeing on food and sleep :)

We go back in on Halloween for our next visit. I'm so super excited to find out if you, little raspberry, are a boy or a girl on Christmas Eve. The most amazing part of my life was seeing you and hearing your super fast heartbeat. It was 154 beats per minute. It blew me away to see your heart pulse and know that you are alive inside me.

I love you dearly!

Love - Mom

Dear Pea

Hello Little Pea, We go to the doctor on Tuesday. It took long enough to get an appointment! I'm so excited to see the hospital where you will be born and all the other fun things we have in store. You are still making mommy very, very sick. I wake up every morning and hurl, at least once, and the last couple days, it's been either before or after every meal. I'm trying to keep food down for you, but for some reason, we don't agree. I hope I start feeling better soon and you and I can get along MUCH better! I wasn't liking meat at all, but now it doesn't seem to matter what I eat, if anything, it will come back up. Little Pea, please be healthy, I'm doing what I can to give you everything. You have a brain now, and grew 3 times in size this week. I will get to see you for the first time soon. That makes me very, very happy. I love you. Love - Mommy