Little Miss Avery LeeAnn!

Avery LeeAnn Butler,

You were born May 18th 2013, at 4:44 pm, weighing in at 6 pounds 9.2 ounces and 19 inches long.  Every time I threw up, every hormone that changed my body, every complaint I had about my back, my stomach, my shortness of breath, has been ALL worth it.  Every awful event that has happened in the last 10 month has been worth every ounce of pain I endured.  You, Little Miss, are the most, MOST amazing, precious, adorable, fantastic thing I've ever seen in my life.  I love you more than I could EVER express in words.

I started having contractions Friday night at around 10:30.  They were about 15-30 min apart.  Karsyn was helping me keep track of them. So, I decided maybe we needed on last picture of you in my belly.  I took this right before we went home around midnight.  I was up all night having contractions and got very little sleep.  I knew you might be coming soon, but I wasn't getting my hopes up by ANY means.  Daddy and I were planning on going to Eagle for Cooper's game, and even when we woke up and showered, that was still my plan.  I figured Nampa and Eagle were the same distance from the hospital if anything were to happen.  By the time Daddy got out of the shower, he asked me to start timing my contractions.  Starting at 7:15, they were about 3.5-5 min apart.  We decided Eagle was not our best option.  We packed a few things up and headed to the hospital.  I was dilated to a 4 and still 70% efface.  I had the option of walking or a Jacuzzi, you KNOW I picked the Jacuzzi tub :)

The doctor checked us about 45 min later (I was sleeping in the bath between contractions, I was so tired!)  He said he could just about call us 5 cm which meant...I was staying.  Grandma and Grandpa Clark were already there hanging out waiting. to see what was happening next.  They came back and sat with us in our room for quite a while.  Grandma and Grandpa Butler showed up soon afterwards.  Aunt Rachel was there, Uncle Mike showed up for a while.  Aunt Jen, Uncle Shaun and Coop stopped by after Cooper's game.  I was deemed to be in "active labor".  People had places to go, so both your grandma's stayed up until it got not so much fun.  I hadn't eaten since we'd checked into the hospital, so I ate my tapioca pudding in the tub while Daddy held my hand and rubbed my back, we were at 7cm at the point.  Life wasn't so bad at that point.  Every contraction I could see the end and about the time it got bad, they started to come down.  It got too hot in the tub, it wasn't too long later that the heat from the bathroom got to me.  You'll never believe that I started to throw up again.  I struggled through the next 15 min with a bag close by and getting steadily more unhappy.  I would cry as I felt the next contraction coming on.  Once again, about the time that I couldn't stand the pain, it would come back down and be bare-able again.  I was checked again and they said I was at a 9 and almost ready to start pushing.  I wanted you out NOW.  I asked to have the doctor come break the water because I decided if it was going to get more intense, fine, I was ready to have you here!!! Bring on the intense (I figured it couldn't get a whole lot worse).  I started to throw up again and decided the doctor didn't really need to come break my water anymore, because there it was!!! Everyone left the room except Daddy and the nurses.  The next 20 min felt like a lifetime.  I finally asked the nurses if it was too late to take anything for the pain.  As they were discussing this the pain came down, I decided I could make it through a couple more, and guess what, I didn't have to.  The next contraction came with a giant push and the nurse (as Daddy would say) was trying to keep you in.  Kirestan did a great job delivering you as Rochelle walked into the room.  Dr. Parson's was about 30 seconds late to your arrival.  Daddy was scared because apparently you came out purple and not crying.  All I cared about was (first, I checked you were a girl) you were here, on my check, looking like the most perfect angel in the whole wide world.  You looked soooo little (you were/are).  I instantly knew that you are the most important thing in my life.  I instantly fell deep in love with you.  I had no idea how I was going to let anyone else hold you.  I just wanted you to stay right there on my chest forever.  It ended up being ok that someone else took you.  As long as you were in the same room, I decided I would live :)

You didn't get a bath the first day until 10:30 that night.  We had a whole hospital full of people waiting to see you.  Everyone thinks you are just so beautiful.  And they are right.  You have great pink skin, a gorgeous round head, no baby acne, and a head full of the prettiest hair.  Light brown at the roots with blonde tips.  You, Avery, are absolutely adorable!!!

Between the two of us, we had zero complications.  None.  I feel fantastic and the nurses were impressed at how well I was walking at 10:30 when we took you to the nursery for your bath.  With some ibuprofen, I'm feeling quite normal again.  No nausea, no pain, no more heavy tummy.  It's weird that you grow so slow inside of me and I have to adjust to all the things I can't do anymore, and how quickly I can bend over, carry things, and walk a normal pace again.  It's pretty awesome having you here!

One last little story:

We were headed home from Karsyn's softball game last night.  We stayed a little late because you were hungry, so it was dark by the time we left the fields.  We were driving down the blvd and going through a green light.  The car coming towards us, decided not to stop at his red light and turned left in front of us.  My first thought was, that's Avery's side of the car.  The split seconds that passed my mind just kept thinking "ok, they won't hit her, but the car will be totaled".  I kept waiting for the impact and the sound of car on car.  I was waiting to hear the scraping sound of the front of our suburban go along the side of the SUV in front of us.  I'm so happy Daddy was driving.  I have no idea how we didn't hit them.  I have no idea how we missed that car by less than inches.  I swear they hit.  There was no noise, there was no impact.  Daddy pulled into the first parking lot and we both dove into the back of the car to make sure everyone was ok.  I couldn't help but hold your hand and cry.  I've never felt such a horrible feeling in my entire life.   I hope to never EVER feel that way again (I'm guessing I will though).  At that moment, Daddy and I both understood what it means and feels like to protect you with our lives.  I already knew I felt that way, but it was a huge reality check.  3 days old, and the thought of losing you, or you being hurt, killed every cell in my body.  We were fine.  Last night, we went to bed, said our prayers, had a snack, and went to sleep.

Avery, I love you!  Unconditional love that I knew existed, but haven't felt until now.  We will continue to say our prayers and love you with all that we have.  I'm so glad you're in our lives and finally here to say hello to the world!  You're such a lucky girl! And I'm even luckier to be your mom!

Here's to our first 3 days home!
I love you!
Mommy